<!DOCTYPE html>
<html>
<head>
<meta charset="UTF-8">
<title>Of Memories and Souls by TheSkyAtMidnight</title>
<style type="text/css">

body { background-color: #ffffff; }
.CI {
text-align:center;
margin-top:0px;
margin-bottom:0px;
padding:0px;
}
.center   {text-align: center;}
.cover    {text-align: center;}
.full     {width: 100%; }
.quarter  {width: 25%; }
.smcap    {font-variant: small-caps;}
.u        {text-decoration: underline;}
.bold     {font-weight: bold;}
</style>
</head>
<body>
<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27262441">Of Memories and Souls</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheSkyAtMidnight/pseuds/TheSkyAtMidnight'>TheSkyAtMidnight</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Friendship, Gen, Light Angst, Post-Hogwarts</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-10-29</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-10-29</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-07 01:46:50</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,927</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27262441</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheSkyAtMidnight/pseuds/TheSkyAtMidnight</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Seven years after the war, an encounter with a dementor leaves Harry with a sad realisation.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Hermione Granger &amp; Harry Potter &amp; Ron Weasley</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>12</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Of Memories and Souls</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p><i> <b><span class="u"> Disclaimer: </span></b></i> Harry Potter does not belong to me. (Never will) Only to JK Rowling</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“No!”<br/>
<br/>
“Mister Creevey!”<br/>
<br/>
“I mean, I’m sorry Mr. Rivers… but no, I can’t go with you to Hogwarts. It’s Saturday and-”<br/>
<br/>
“Mr. Creevey, that’s exactly why the ‘eadmistress wants us to go today, so classes resume Monday peacefully.” hissed Mr. Gawain Rivers, current Head of the Auror department.<br/>
<br/>
“-Not to mention bloody dementors. I’m sorry Mr. Rivers. I’m not coming.”<br/>
<br/>
“What’s happening at Hogwarts?” asked Harry, who’d been in his office next door, poring over a cold case.<br/>
<br/>
“Ah Mr. Potter, would you agree to come with me then?”<br/>
<br/>
Harry frowned “To Hogwarts?”<br/>
<br/>
Mr. Gawain nodded “Dementors in the Forbidden Forest. The Headmistress asked us to look into it.”<br/>
<br/>
“Yeah, I’ll come.” said Harry, he wasn’t making much progress on his case and any reason to visit Hogwarts was welcome. “I’ll just close up and…”<br/>
<br/>
“Right. I’ll be waiting here.”<br/>
<br/>
Harry heard a holler of ‘Thanks Harry’ from Dennis as he flicked his wrist, causing files to neatly line up in shelves. He wrapped a scarf around his neck, muttered “Nox” and walked out, shutting the door behind him.<br/>
<br/>
It’d been five years since he’d joined the Auror Department after the war. Hermione had then pestered him to get an apparition license. <i>‘Harry, you are getting that License. The Boy who Lived or not. Safety is important. You’re not breaking any more laws. Please don’t be an idiot.’</i> he smiled remembering her tirade.<br/>
<br/>
Mr. Gawain broke the companiable silence as they made their way to the Apparition point.<br/>
<br/>
“I never really understood Mr. Potter, why you left active field to join the Investigations Department. It was after two and a-half years you asked for a transfer?”<br/>
“Yessir. Almost three.”<br/>
<br/>
“Why was that?”<br/>
<br/>
Harry thought about his answer, he hadn’t been asked the reason by his Head of Department before “Well, for two years I enjoyed it. The thrill of the chase. The raids. The satisfaction of catching dodgy blokes, and then it sort of, wore off…”<br/>
<br/>
Mr. Gawain hummed noncommittally. Harry continued, “I was…tired. Not of catching Dark Wizards,” he said hurriedly, “But of the strain that came with the job, I began sleeping less at night, grew more irritable and snappier when we didn’t manage to catch ‘em…” Harry shrugged, “I thought about it a fair bit, talked with my friends and decided on the investigation department. I’d always enjoyed solving mysteries, puzzling things out…wasn’t such a big leap.”<br/>
<br/>
“Like who put your name in that Goblet eh?” Harry nodded. “You have been doing a good job. Solved plenty of cases this past year and half with your team.” Gawain gave Harry the side-eye, “Though I do reckon, that Ms. Granger’s been helping...”<br/>
<br/>
Harry smiled sheepishly “Her inputs do help.”<br/>
<br/>
“Hmmm. Mr. Weasley, the youngest has great strategic skills...they seem to have developed over the course of a year in fact...”<br/>
<br/>
“Ron’s always been good at chess. Hermione and I just nudged him to apply those skills”<br/>
<br/>
“Ah,” Mr. Gawain gave Harry a smile. “Now coming to today’s matter- around fifteen dementors have been spotted, somewhere in the Forbidden Forest, near school grounds. I assume you have practice with casting a corporeal Patronus?”<br/>
<br/>
“Yes sir.”<br/>
<br/>
“You’re able to hold it for as long as needed?”<br/>
<br/>
“Yes sir.”<br/>
<br/>
“Good. You know the rules, Mr. Potter. We collect our stash of chocolate before apparating, as we approach the area, pop a piece in. When you spot a dementor, cast your patronus. When all of ‘em have been driven off, we meet at a decided point and erect the wall”<br/>
<br/>
“Erm…the wall?”<br/>
<br/>
Mr. Gawain pursed his lips, “A temporary wall against dementors was developed by Mr. Goldstein, Ms. Granger and Ms. Bones a few years ago, it self-destructs after a week, which is more than enough to drive the dementors in search of new feeding grounds. A great help the spell’s been ever since the Minister’s disbanded them.”<br/>
<br/>
Harry vaguely remembered Hermione being very excited about a collaboration project and staying up all night, for days on end, researching. He hadn’t paid much attention, tired out by the raids. “The incantation?” he asked.<br/>
<br/>
Mr. Gawain snorted “Oh no, you’ll not be helping with it, it requires tremendous practice and a great grasp of Old Gaelic. I’ll ask the Headmistress to help. You better learn to cast that Mr. Potter, Merlin knows, you may need it for an investigation someday.”<br/>
<br/>
Harry agreed, then ducked his head at the disapproving look he was given. They walked in silence until the Apparition Point. He collected his chocolate stash and thanked the sleepy wizard at the desk, “Hogsmeade?”<br/>
<br/>
“In front of the Hog’s Head.” answered Mr. Rivers, and apparated with a loud crack that echoed off the walls.<br/>
<br/>
Harry went up to the apparition point and concentrated on imagining the dingy inn, with its worn-out wooden sign above the door (a wild boar’s severed head leaking blood onto the white cloth around it). He felt the familiar sensation of being forced through a very tight rubber tube and everything went black.</p><p> </p><p>Harry landed on his feet, wobbling a little as the usual feeling of nausea washed over him. The village was quite dark, now that it was late evening. He smiled at the silhouettes of cottages and shops visible by the light of the streetlamps and lit upper windows.<br/>
<br/>
He turned to see Mr. Rivers gazing wistfully, in awe into the distance. his smile grew wider and his chest did a funny squeeze as he caught sight of Hogwarts.<br/>
<br/>
“Breath-taking as usual innit?”<br/>
<br/>
“Yeah”<br/>
<br/>
“Right, let’s be off then, don’t want to keep the Headmistress waiting.”<br/>
<br/>
They turned down the side street and made their way up the main street, past Dervish and Bangs, towards the castle gates. Filch, with Mrs. Norris at his shoulder opened the gates with a scowl. Harry grimaced at Mrs. Norris whose bulging yellow eyes followed his movements. He wondered how old she was as they strode towards Hagrid’s hut where Professor McGonagall stood waiting.<br/>
<br/>
“Auror Rivers, Investigator Potter”<br/>
<br/>
“Headmistress” “Professor.”<br/>
<br/>
Harry saw a flicker of amusement in her eyes.<br/>
<br/>
Even as they closed the distance to the forest, he felt the subtle chill biting into his flesh and seeping into his bones, the temperature dropped and a cold fog started to emerge.<br/>
<br/>
“They should make an appearance presently, gentlemen. I do hope you’ll sort this out soon. I will wait at Hagrid’s for your return…unless you need me along?” said Professor McGonagall, shooting them a sharp look.<br/>
<br/>
“I’ll need your help to erect the wall, Headmistress”<br/>
<br/>
Harry saw the professor nod and shoot him a disappointed look, he almost expected her to take points from Gryffindor any moment. But she only wished them luck and strode up the path to Hagrid’s hut, drawing her cloak more tightly around her.<br/>
<br/>
“Right, we patrol now, Mr. Potter. Any questions?”<br/>
<br/>
“None, sir”<br/>
<br/>
Mr. Rivers gave him a once-over and gestured to the right, Harry pulled a chocolate out of his stash and drew his wand.<br/>
<br/>
He murmured a Lumos and went into the forest, being careful not to stray too far from the edge. The cold was more pronounced now, senses alert, Harry waited, cautiously pacing the forest floor.<br/>
<br/>
He absently touched his scar, recalling his walk to Voldemort… the resurrection stone was here somewhere, he furiously pulled his mind from wandering, he couldn’t afford distractions now.<br/>
<br/>
Harry shivered as frost began creeping up the trees, and icy tendrils of fog reached out to him. He sagged under an unseen weight, his breath caught and solidified in his chest as a distant screaming commenced in his ear. He tried thinking of the time he’d snogged Ginny and the fun time spent with Ron and Hermione but all he could do was stay still as the sound of rattling breath drew near.<br/>
<br/>
The indistinct screaming intensified, it wasn’t his mother’s scream of “Not Harry...” but Ginny’s cry of grief and despair. And then there was Sirius falling through the veil, Hermione being tortured at Malfoy Manor; Dobby with a bloody knife in his body, a cold voice saying “Kill the spare”, Ron leaving them in the forest; Remus, Tonks, Colin, Fred -all lying spread-eagled on the stone floor, Dumbledore dead, Dumbledore forcing him to make him drink in the cave…Harry slumped to his knees, he could just give in…so much suffering-what was there to be happy about? His wand clattered onto the forest floor and the rattling sound came nearer and nearer.<br/>
<br/>
The rumble of an engine became audible too, and something slammed into Harry, snapping him out of the stupor. Harry caught sight of his wand in the glare of sudden light, took it, and roared “EXPECTO PATRONUM!” As the dementors retreated faced with his stag he found himself staring at Arthur Weasley’s Ford Anglia. Harry uttered an earnest thank you to the car, maybe he could name one of his children Ford Anglia Potter?<br/>
<br/>
Harry sat there, panting, as the car purred away further into the forest. “Mr. Potter” growled Professor McGonagall, “You did not survive V-Voldemort, to be taken down by a dementor”<br/>
<br/>
Harry felt his face heating up, “No, Professor” he affirmed and took a deep breath. Steadying himself, he gathered his emotions as well as the flood of memories the dementors had brought out and pushed them away, raising his mental shields. He’d finally learnt occlumency. It’d been an optional requirement for Aurors, and he’d decided to learn, never forgetting what its ignorance had cost him.  He had to admit though, Professor Snape had been the most unfit to teach him.<br/>
<br/>
“On your feet now Mr. Potter, we cast our patronuses together. Auror Rivers?”<br/>
<br/>
“Ready, Headmistress.”<br/>
<br/>
All three of them bellowed “Expecto Patronum” in unison. A stag, a tabby cat and a Scottish wildcat sprang forth from their wands and charged at the horde of dementors, driving them back.<br/>
<br/>
Harry heard Mr. Rivers and Professor McGonagall begin incanting in a mixture of Latin and old Gaelic. A shimmering barrier began taking shape along the entire edge of the forest, he observed that the dementors shied away from it.<br/>
<br/>
“Thank you, Headmistress,”<br/>
<br/>
“No, thank you, the both of you.”<br/>
<br/>
“For Hogwarts, Headmistress.”<br/>
<br/>
Professor McGonagall gave them a tired smile and headed back to the castle. Harry waved to Fang who was peeping out from the hut and they set off on the way back to the Hog’s Head.<br/>
<br/>
As they went past Dervish and Bangs again, Harry scowled, “I didn’t do much Mr. Rivers, almost got myself bloody kissed.”<br/>
<br/>
“Now, that’s not your fault. I s’pose the forest brought back some memories of the war. And, I haven’t seen a patronus as strong as yours Mr. Potter.”<br/>
Harry smiled glumly “Thanks sir.”<br/>
<br/>
They walked the rest of the way to the Hog’s Head in quietness. “Do you need a hand sir?” queried Harry who’d noticed Mr. Rivers move a bit stiffly. “No, I’ll be fine. A bit of magical exhaustion is all,” he smiled, “Have a good night, Mr. Potter.”<br/>
<br/>
“Alright Mr. Rivers. You as well.”<br/>
<br/>
After his senior had apparated Harry stood for a moment, focused on picturing the street of Grimmauld place and with a crack, appeared in front of numbers eleven and thirteen.<br/>
<br/>
No. 12, Grimmauld Place emerged from between the two as Harry thought of it as Order Headquarters. The Fidelius had been useless after Yaxley had gotten in during the war but it still remained.<br/>
<br/>
Harry pushed open the battered front door, went through the long hallway and up to his room on the second floor; He sometimes came by here if work was late, not wanting to wake anyone in the Burrow. He sank down onto the bed, something niggled at the back of his mind; Harry shook it off, too drained to concentrate or lower his shields to check it out.  He called for Kreacher.<br/>
<br/>
“Kreacher!”<br/>
<br/>
“Master Potter,” breathed Kreacher, surveying Harry with bloodshot eyes,” Master would like hot chocolate?”<br/>
<br/>
“Sure, thank you Kreacher.”<br/>
<br/>
The elf, now used to being thanked, merely blinked, bowed, disappeared, and reappeared a few minutes later with a steaming mug. Harry scrawled a note to Ron and Hermione asking them to visit number 12 tomorrow.<br/>
<br/>
“Give this to Hermione or Ron.”<br/>
<br/>
“Kreacher be doing that Master. Does master need anything else?”<br/>
<br/>
“No, nothing else. Good night Kreacher.”<br/>
<br/>
“Night, master.”<br/>
<br/>
Harry sipped from his mug, thoughts wandering, he summoned a blanket, bundled up and succumbed to sleep.</p><p> </p><p>The next morning, Harry was woken by Kreacher’s insistent calls.<br/>
<br/>
“Wha- “said Harry wand at the ready.<br/>
<br/>
Kreacher held out a letter “Letter came early morning, master.”<br/>
<br/>
“Right yeah, thanks. What’s for breakfast?”<br/>
<br/>
Kreacher’s eyes bulged, he let out an agonized squeak, “Master- “<br/>
<br/>
Harry blinked, “Its fine, Take your time. I just woke up.” He tore open the note and smiled, Hermione had said they’d be here by ten in the morning. Muttering a tempus, Harry hurried out of bed.<br/>
<br/>
The clock struck ten as Harry finished his breakfast; not a minute later, Ron’s terrier scampered in asking him to open the door and let them in. He signalled to Kreacher, who popped away to do so.<br/>
<br/>
Hermione and Ron traipsed in and sank down onto two chairs. “What’s the matter ‘Mione?” asked Harry. She was eyeing him with a gimlet eye.<br/>
<br/>
“You haven’t stopped occluding, Harry.”<br/>
<br/>
“I haven’t.” he agreed.<br/>
<br/>
“What happened?” Now Ron was eyeing him with concern too.<br/>
<br/>
“I’d gone with Auror Rivers yesterday to deal with some dementors at Hogwarts. I…almost got myself kissed.”<br/>
<br/>
“Bloody hell mate.”<br/>
<br/>
“Harry! You have to be careful. Oh you- “<br/>
<br/>
“I am careful Hermione! I was- “<br/>
<br/>
“Bollocks, you’re saying you almost got your soul sucked out. That is not being careful!” There was a moment of stunned silence, “What, Ronald? Just because I don’t usually swear, doesn’t mean I won’t.” she glared at Ron, who stared back.<br/>
<br/>
“Blimey ‘Mione I never- “<br/>
<br/>
“I know exactly what you meant. You- “Harry rolled his eyes; Ron had cut her off with a kiss.<br/>
<br/>
“Works every time Harry”<br/>
<br/>
Hermione, who’d gone rather pink in the face, gave him a scowl.<br/>
<br/>
“That is not the point. Our best friend has survived yet another near-death experience. There’s been too many already!”<br/>
“Hermione, I’m fine. I snapped out of it.”<br/>
<br/>
She gave him a suspicious look as if to say ‘By yourself?’<br/>
<br/>
Harry gave her a solemn smile and continued, there was no way he was going to mention the car now “But the thing is- I didn’t hear my parents this time.”<br/>
<br/>
“That’s… good?” said Ron.<br/>
<br/>
Hermione seemed to have understood what he was about to say, though, she waited for him to continue, a small sad smile on her face. “ I realised the memories of my parents’ last moments might never have been mine. At all. I think they were-they belonged to <i>him</i>- the Horcrux.”<br/>
<br/>
Ron swore, voice quiet, “Fucking hell.”<br/>
<br/>
Hermione looked at him keenly, “Harry, lower your shields. Let it out. If you don’t now…they-it can come crashing down later when- well, we’re here for you to confide in now. Harry, please stop occluding.”<br/>
<br/>
Harry closed his eyes and nodded curtly. With a deep breath, he pulled the emotions and memories he’d stowed away into focus and let his shields slip. He took a shuddering breath and cracked open an eye. Ron and Hermione sat, watching, concern etched into their faces.<br/>
<br/>
Harry looped his fingers together, “I heard Ginny scream, when I- when she thought I’d died, then Sirius fell through the veil, and you were being tortured at Malfoy Manor and Dobby died,” his voice broke, “ I was forcing Dumbledore to drink in the cave and Dumbledore was dead and-“ Harry stopped, Hermione had pulled him into a hug.<br/>
<br/>
“Oh, Harry!”<br/>
<br/>
Ron put a hand on his shoulder and said softly, “Merlin’s beard. You’re a strong one mate.”<br/>
<br/>
“We’ve always known that Ron.” came Hermione’s voice muffled by Harry’s sweater.<br/>
<br/>
“I wouldn’t be as good without the both of you. You’ve been brilliant. Still are.”<br/>
<br/>
Hermione let out a stifled sob and hugged him tighter. Ron squeezed his shoulder, the warmth of his hand bleeding into Harry.<br/>
<br/>
“Its just terrible,” Harry resumed, tone bitter, “To know that, the only memories of your parents were never your own but <i>their murderer’s</i>.” Harry could still recall the memory vaguely - having seen it numerous times, but he knew now, and it wasn’t the same.<br/>
<br/>
Hermione drew back, eyes red rimmed, “That doesn’t mean you love them any less Harry. It doesn’t change that.”<br/>
<br/>
“No” Harry agreed. “But it’s still different.”<br/>
<br/>
Ron swore suddenly, “By merlin’s left saggy- that’s why!”<br/>
<br/>
“What?”<br/>
<br/>
“Remember, how dementors were oddly fixated on you in third year. They feed on souls and happy emotions innit? And you had an extra piece of soul.”<br/>
<br/>
Harry blinked. “Yeah…yeah. I- “<br/>
<br/>
Ron ignored that and plodded on, “Now about memories… I can always ask mum or dad or for a memory of your parents for you. I’m sure they’ll agree.”<br/>
<br/>
Hermione piped up thoughtfully, “If you allow me, I could look in your mind and even dredge up your own memories of your parents if there are any. Though memories don’t usually begin forming until two years of age…”<br/>
<br/>
“You’d do that?”<br/>
<br/>
“Of course, Harry.”<br/>
<br/>
“We’re with you mate.”<br/>
<br/>
“For better or for worse.”<br/>
<br/>
“Always.”<br/>
<br/>
And sitting in the drawing room of Grimmauld place Harry knew, as he’d known the day of Dumbledore’s funeral at Hogwarts, that it was true; They’d been there with him for all this time, they’d be there with him, always.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Thanks for reading!</p></blockquote></div></div>
</body>
</html>